My name is Robin Barkins. I was first diagnosed with HIV at age 15 – just 4 months before my 16th birthday. When I first heard the news, I instantly thought my life was over. I refused all HIV treatment. I began to use drugs heavily and I slept around with different men and women without disclosing my status. I was angry at the world and I wanted everyone to feel my pain.
For 10 years I did a lot of demoralizing things. I kept my status a secret from the world; I even kept it from my own mother. After 10 years of running from my problems, using drugs and drinking alcohol; I began to get tired of the way I was living my life. I decided to go into treatment.
Never in my wildest dreams would I have ever thought that going to treatment would be the beginning of a new and improved life for me. I began to face my problems and fears head on and I found some coping skills in the process. These were skills I could use in case a problem came my way – I now have a better way to deal with these issues instead of running to get high.
I surrendered totally as far as my health was concerned and I began to start loving myself. I decided that my story could help others. While in treatment, I began to share my story which gave other people hope. In the process, it helped me as well.
I am currently 3 years sober, and my goal is to help women and men who are suffering with substance abuse and HIV. I want to give them hope and let them know they are not alone.
Here’s some food for thought as you watch the Olympic Opening Ceremony tonight: What if the Olympic rings were used to show inequalities between regions?
This infographic by designer Gustavo Sousa uses the Olympic rings to show the number of people living with HIV across the regions.
The beginning of the football season is a special occasion for many Americans which incorporates its own set of traditions and special preparations. From family gatherings around the T.V. set to tailgate barbeques in the stadium parking lot, each American family celebrates football in its own unique way.
This year, UNTIL is offering you a way to make the football tradition even more special. If you are in the Bay Area this season and you want to support an awesome team and a great cause all at the same time, there is no need to look any further. This year we have teamed up with the Oakland Raiders to raise funds and awareness for HIV/AIDS. When you buy select Raiders tickets through us, a part of your purchase goes to the UTAC cause.
New Jersey Ride Against AIDS is a three-day bicycling event that benefits New Jersey AIDS charities. The ride begins at High Point State Park in beautiful northwest New Jersey and concludes in the charming Victorian town of Cape May at the southernmost point of the state. The length of the ride is approximately 250 miles.
In order to participate in the Ride, you will need to download and complete all necessary forms. Individual riders are required to raise a minimum of $1500 in pledge donations to participate. Teams of 4 or more riders may raise a minimum of $1000 per team member. Crew members are not required to fundraise, but are encouraged to do so.
Riders may choose to participate for the entire 3 days or may choose to do the one-day, 60 mile ride on Sunday. Crew members are required to participate for the full three day event.
100% of pledge donations raised by riders and crew go directly to the charities.
Please visit our FAQ page for frequently asked questions pertaining to the ride. There is also a wealth of information pertaining to this ride on this site. If you have a specific question that might not be found here, please feel free to leave a comment or question below or contact us at:
NJ Ride Against AIDS
P.O. Box 127
Bradley Beach, NJ 07720
I am embarrassed to talk about SEX
So I avoid talking to my children
I giggle and laugh nervously
Whenever the word SEX is mentioned
I am too embarrassed to look up
In the age of HIV/AIDS
My embarrassment continues
About SEX, AIDS and CONDOMS
I am even afraid to read about the disease
I am so embarrassed
Now, I am at a loss
My daughter, my son,
my husband and I have AIDS
We have never talked about SEX and AIDS
Even when we knew better
We were too embarrassed
Too embarrassed to protect ourselves
Too embarrassed to keep DEATH at bay
Now I am too embarrassed
To let anyone know about us
My FAMILY and AIDS
Then one day
My mother opened my eyes
She said, ” Your family is not dying of AIDS
It is dying of embarrassment,
A deadly OPPORTUNISTIC INFECTION”
Today, we are no longer sick with embarrassment
We know better
That noone ever died of embarrassment
But DAILY, a loved one dies of AIDS.
Maria not only video blogs, but she also does most of them in both English and Spanish so she can help raise awareness with as many people as possible!
LETTER TO HIV. THE OTHER FACE OF LIVING WITH HIV
CARTA PARA EL VIH. LA OTRA CARA DE VIVIR CON EL VIRUS
Maria’s Letter to HIV:
Hey HIV,
I want to say so many things to you — maybe curse at you, maybe tell you how much you hurt my body, mind and soul.
You have lived inside of me since I was 16 years old! You thought you were going to destroy me didn’t you? As you did to so many friends and people that were family!
You thought, Oh she has always been told she’s a nothing and will never amount to nothing … so she might just take her own life, destroy it with drugs or destroy others by giving it on purpose out of hate and bitterness. But no!!!!! You never won, never will win!
Because I am one of those people that have been through it all, and still manage to have a pure soul and good spirit. So you actually helped me. Thank you HIV … Thank you from the bottom of my heart because you actually formed me and changed the little girl and teenager that was full of hate, an uncompassionate, angry kid that didn’t have any direction but to do bad things, and felt so worthless that she had to find the worst to feel the best! That is why I joined that gang: because I felt that I actually was going to have a family after all! Until you found, or I let, the opportunity for you to come and invade my blood.
I always felt I would die, max, by the age of 28. It was written that someone with HIV/AIDS wouldn’t live for more than 10 years!
You actually saved my life … because of you, HIV, I am alive and loving myself and my body more. Because of you I met my partner and some wonderful people in this journey we call life! 23 years have passed and I always describe it as a murderer living with you that is finding every opportunity to kill you. You are a sneak and very smart! But I am smarter than you are, HIV. I have managed to dodge death many times because of my human instincts. You have destroyed my immune system to make me weak and vulnerable.
Enough!!! Leave me the fuck alone bitch!
I am tired of you and being your poster child, just because I am trying to go out there and show my pretty face to save the youth or anyone who wants to listen.
I can’t wait until they kill you, and you leave all of us alone!
So many people have suffered because of you, HIV. You should feel like a cornered animal that is about to get smashed! And that time is coming soon! How does it feel huh?
Just because it took something as nasty as you to change my self-worth doesn’t mean you are important! Because you are not.
30 years of dealing with you! Of you killing our brothers and sisters, making so many suffer not only physically but mentally.
Hey HIV, I know that just by someone protecting themselves you can’t come in. But you see some people still don’t get it. They think living with you is freaking easy!
I am tired of taking toxic pills because of you!
I am tired of getting so many tubes of blood taken every 3 to 4 months because of you!
I am tired of thinking, Is my medication still working? Am I developing resistance???
Tired, tired, tiredddddddddddddddd of you, HIV!
Get the Hell away from all of us! We don’t want you or need you to make us feel worth something, or to feel we have a purpose! We can find other things in life besides you, HIV!!!
And I believe this life sentence, or life on parole, of living with you is going to end soon.
I just hope your friends, the ones that have made billions and billions on us, will have the humanity and instead of making better medication so you and we can live in more harmony together, they can find something to get you the Hell out of my being, HIV.
You are not welcomed here! Never were, never will be! And I will fight you until my last breath.
And again I am sorry for whoever is reading this and has to read this cursing. But you. HIV/AIDS … you are a bitch! You will always be a bitch and that will never change!
Always remember, everyone: One mistake and HIV will live with you forever. You don’t want that.
So please: Test yourself, protect yourself and love yourself!
Don’t be one more statistic.
Love and light to you all … not you, HIV!
Maria T. Mejia
June 27: National HIV Testing Day! GET TESTED. KNOW YOUR STATUS. Visit www.hivtest.org to find a HIV Testing Site near you. Many Testing sites offer FREE HIV TESTING.
One of the most important issues revolving around the HIV/AIDS crisis I have discovered while working with Until There’s A Cure is the education of the virus itself. This paired with diminished public consciousness has raised great concerns within the AIDS community regarding the awareness of the disease and, with the economy compromised, it has forced many organizations to switch their focus from fundraising to awareness raising. This ability to adapt to economic, political, and social undulations is extremely important to the success of a particular organization’s mission. While, from its inception, UTAC has primarily focused on granting funds they must now turn their efforts to educating the public, which will hopefully, stimulate a dialogue about the disease in order to work towards the goal of eradicating the virus. By reminding the public of the harsh realities of HIV/AIDS, that it still exists, there is still no cure and that every individual is still at risk there is a hope that people will place more efforts into understanding the seriousness of the disease and begin to work again to help complete the fight against AIDS.
Despite various non-profit and government driven efforts to encourage testing and the practice of safe sex and/or drug injection statistics will show that HIV infections continue to rise meaning humans continue to spread the disease. Whether this is due to lack of education or the human tendency to neglect proper health practices is hard to judge. Regardless, I am disappointed every time I hear of someone (especially when I know they have some kind of education regarding sexually transmitted diseases) having a “pregnancy scare” because they didn’t use protection, as though a baby would be the worst outcome. As humans we make mistakes and some of us are fortunate to learn from them while surviving somewhat unscathed; however, that shouldn’t relinquish our responsibility to our fellow human beings or ourselves. Nonetheless, the question rises of how do we better educate the people of our nation? One of the largest demographics at risk for contracting HIV is adolescents and due to the stigmas surrounding the virus and its transmission there are difficulties presented regarding how to approach proper education. How does an organization teach youth about safe sex and drug use without promoting either? How does an organization use our nation’s children to help spread that education? Especially when one takes into consideration the influence and power of religious and conservative thought. These are only some of the challenges organizations face just to equip people with the proper knowledge of caring for themselves and others and, ultimately, putting a stop to the spread of one of human history’s most deadly viruses. If people can abandon the negative associations that have become synonymous with HIV/AIDS we can begin talk a little more freely about stopping the spread of it. A vaccine might be years or decades away but if we can approach the virus intelligently and courageously, without fear and hesitation maybe we can suppress its force. Until There’s A Cure has established this from the beginning with the bracelet and although the focus of their undertaking has had to shift slightly they can still use this piece of jewelry as a tool to prompt conversation, a reminder of the overwhelming spread of HIV and hopefully a means to end AIDS.
Greg Louganis is one of the most successful Olympic divers ever to grace the games, with 4 gold medals and countless other titles in international games. In the 1988 Olympics he hit his head on the diving board and suffered from a concussion, yet still qualified with the highest score on his next dive. Greg Louganis demonstrated his greatest level of courage, however, when he came out as gay in 1994 and announced that he was HIV positive to the public. Greg Louganis serves not only as a role model to divers and to all athletes, but to a whole community of people stigmatized for being gay and for being infected with HIV. Thanks to Greg’s courage, we are one step closer to breaking down stereotypes, and inspired to continue the fight against HIV/AIDS.
WHY does the fight need your help Until There's A Cure? This is why. The need for a Cure is URGENT. LIKE and SHARE to help Raise Awareness!WHY do we need a Cure?
My name is Robin Barkins. I was first diagnosed with HIV at age 15 – just 4 months before my 16th birthday. When I first heard the news, I instantly thought my life was over. I refused all HIV treatment. I began to use drugs heavily and I slept around with different men and women without disclosing my status. I was angry at the world and I wanted everyone to feel my pain.
All riders that participate in The Ride must comply with all of the 
You don’t want that.
